First to thy own self be true and it shalst follow as night the day, thou shall not be false to any other man. I heard this in a play once, and immediately, I had a plan. - self confidence
That from then on, whenever I was asked, what’s your favorite quote from the past, those famous Shakespearean words I would spout out of my mouth, never thinking twice as to what it was about
Why? Because it was so important for me to come across as the smart, intelligent guy, my oh my
You see, ever since I was little, with a self-image that was so brittle, there were these expectations, these labels stuck onto me by the world around me, dictating the recipe to be, a happy man
to be seen as smart and attractive, and be as successful as I possibly can,
so to achieve this criteria, I went about my life with a type of composed hysteria, like a bacteria
But the universe always has a different plan.
For example, being considered attractive as far as I’m aware, depended on so many things, like the clothes you wear, whether your you are dark or fair, and of course, for a man like me? - to have a full head of hair
And to be follicle-ly challenged can be a tough gig in a world that can be so cruel. It comes loaded with the shaming, the names and of course, the ridicule.
So you can imagine my strife, when at the age of 25, I got asked if I was going bald, I swear those words cut like a knife.
Since then, it’s been years of fear and dejection, of discomfort when I looked at my own reflection, of pills and lotions, instead of self love n affection
Because isn’t that what it’s all about? All we want from this life, is to be respected, to be loved, but instead we usually end up feeling like we’re rubber gloved
Feeling overburdened with the hair-loss along with other insecurities I picked up along the way, I decided to look for the answers inside, so I asked and I asked until one day, it came to me.
I’ll never forget the moment. I got out of bed,with a big smile on my face, tears of joy welling up, my eyes red, as I said- I love you, I respect you, I trust you
And that’s when I realized that I could spend my whole life jumping through hoops for everyone else, just to be happy, or I leave all of that and simply find that happiness, within me
So now I refuse to choose a life that revolves around what others think or see, instead I choose to focus on what I think of me
I’m distancing myself from anything that tells me I’m not good enough, you know, the crap on TV or the beauty shelf, and replacing them with tools that’ll help me be the best version of myself
And as of right now, I choose to not spend another waking minute in my own prison, accused of heresy, instead, I choose to do something in the next minute that I know will set me free
And for those watching and can relate to my story, I have a message for you.
Remember this my friend, you are not your appearance, you are not your weight, you definitely are not your birth date. Your worth is not in your car, or in your house, neither is it who you are dating or in your spouse.
You are inside of you and your beauty, your worth will only show, when you love and accept that version, the most authentic version of you.
So, I’m going to go now, to be the best version of me that I possibly can, and for your guys, remember this- First to thy own self be true, and it shall follow as night the day, thou shalnt be false to any other man - self confidence